Trends in Marriage

This week we read a number of different talks and I really enjoyed the differences between the talks, articles and videos. One specific point that stood out to me was in the talk given by Elder Dallin H Oaks. He speaks about Bishops counseling couples and when a couple decides to follow their bishop’s counsel and stay together, they end up with a much stronger marriage. “That prospect began with their mutual commitment to keep the commandments, stay active in their Church attendance, scripture reading, and prayer, and to work on their own shortcomings”. These things not only help you personally, but will strengthen your marriage and draw you closer. I can attest to these things in my own marriage as they have gotten us through many hardships. As long as you follow the commandments that our Heavenly Father has given us, He will be with you. Elder Oaks says that a Bishop reported back that along with repentance and following his counsel that ““healing was achieved 100 percent of the time”. In contrast, studies show that couples who divorce or separate are no happier than couples that decided to stay together and work on their marriage.

“There were three parties to our marriage—my husband and I and the Lord. I told myself that if two of us could hang in there, we could hold it together.” I loved this quote in the same talk from a women who stayed in an unhappy marriage for many years until their children were raised. It shows true commitment and effort and that often times with time and patience, you can make it through. If she had given up years before, they wouldn’t have had the chance to work through what was making them unhappy. Seeing the Lord as a third party in your marriage is a great perspective in my eyes because He plays a large part and wants us to succeed. Our Heavenly Father wants the best for each of us and is there for us through our lowest of lows and highest of highs. If we can hold it together through the hard times, just imagine how much stronger our marriages will be on the other side.